Achy Breaky Song

You can torture me With Donnie & Marie You can play some Barry Manilow Or you can play some schlock Like New Kids on the Block Or any Village People song you know Or play Vanilla Ice Hey, you can play him twice And you can play the Bee Gees any day But Mr. DJ, […]

She Never Told Me She Was a Mime

When we first met she seemed perfectly normal… I never dreamed she’d make my life so hard You see, my baby, she started to change… Started lookin’ kinda strange Wearin’ all that white makeup and those black leotards Well, I guess she kept her little secret pretty well Now, ever since I learned the horrible […]

Talk Soup

I dated Siamese twins I slept with Bigfoot, too Get me on Sally Jesse Put me on Donahue ‘Cause I wanna tell the world about it Right Now My dog’s a narcoleptic My mom’s a circus freak I gotta get a spot on Geraldo’s show this week ‘Cause I wanna tell the world about it […]

Harvey the Wonder Hamster

Oh, Harvey, Harvey Harvey the Wonder Hamster He doesn’t bite and he doesn’t squeal He just runs around on his hamster wheel Harvey, Harvey Harvey the Wonder Hamster Hey, Harvey!

Frank’s 2000″ TV

Risin’ above the city, blockin’ out the noonday sun, it dwarfs The mighty redwoods and it towers over everyone I still remember… when that delivery truck came down our block What a lucky guy, I hear he got the last one in stock And the neighbors are just green (and the neighbors (and the neighbors…)) […]

Waffle King

It took a lifetime, but I finally found The perfect waffle recipe You’ll never find a batter any better in this whole stinkin’ town One little bite and I’m sure that you’ll agree Your eyes roll back and your knees get weak Aw, you’re gonna lick your plate clean People come from miles around just […]

Bohemian Polka

Is this the real life Is this just fantasy Caught in a landslide No escape from reality Open your eyes Look up to the skies and see I’m just a poor boy, I need no sympathy ‘Cause I’m easy come, easy go Little high, little low Anyway the wind blows, doesn’t really matter to me […]

Livin’ in the Fridge

There’s something weird in the fridge today I don’t know what it is Food I can’t recognize My roommate won’t throw a thing away I guess it’s probably his It looks like it’s alive… And livin’ in the fridge… livin’ in the fridge Livin’ in the fridge… livin’ in the fridge There’s something gross in […]

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