Posts in category: Even Worse
Good Old Days

Oh some times I think back to when I was younger Life was so much simpler then Dad would be up at dawn He’d be watering the lawn Or maybe going fishing again Oh and mom would be fixing up something in the kitchen Fresh biscuits or hot apple pie And I’d spend all day […]


Yeah! Well, Milton Bradley’s got a def one. It’s a Twister! (Twister! Twister! Twister!) Yeah, all the girls and homeboys Playin’ Twister! (Twister! Twister! Twister!) Spin the spinner and call the shot. Twister ties you up in a knot. That’s Twister. Yeah, Twister! Check it! Right foot blue! (Right foot blue!) Left hand red! (Left […]

Velvet Elvis

My life, it used to be incomplete, Till I saw what I was looking for at a drive-in swap meet. My life it won’t be the same again. Now I’m proud to say the king lives on inside my den. Oh, it’s all I live for, it’s all I need. My velvet Elvis, My velvet […]


(cheering) Here she comes now, wants her alimony Bleedin’ me dry as a bony bony Workin’ three jobs just to stay in debt now Well, first she took my nest egg then she took the nest I said yeah (yeah), yeah (yeah), yeah (yeah), yeah (yeah), yeah (yeah) (Yeah) ‘Cause she took my house (alimony), […]


Me-he-he-helanie What can the problem be Sweet Me-he-he-he-helanie Why won’t you go out with me She lived across the street on the fifteenth floor of the Gilmore building I saw her in the shower reaching for some soap I knew she had to be the girl for me And to think I probably never would […]


La-la-la-la-lasagna You want-a some-a lasagna magnifico Or a-maybe spaghetti Ay, you supper’s a-ready now, where you go Mama mia bambino Mama mia bambino, ‘samatta you ‘Samatta you, ‘samatta you You should-a taste my lasagna Ay, you no like-a lasagna That’s okay too How about-a calzone Some-a nice minestrone, its good for you Have-a some marinara […]

I Think I’m a Clone Now

Isn’t it strange Feels like I’m lookin’ in the mirror What would people say If only they knew that I was Part of some geneticist’s plan (plan-plan-plan) Born to be a carbon copy man (man-man-man) There in a petri dish late one night They took a donor’s body cell and fertilized a human egg and […]

You Make Me

You make me wanna slam my head against the wall You make me do the limbo You make me wanna buy a slurpee at the mall You make me watch the Gong Show There’s really something kinda strange about you, baby, but I can’t exactly seem to put my finger on it You make me […]

(This Song’s Just) Six Words Long

This song’s just six words long This song’s just six words long This song’s just six words long This song’s just six words long Couldn’t think of any lyrics No, I never wrote the lyrics So I’ll just sing any old lyrics That come to mind, child You really need words Whole lotta rhyming words […]

Stuck in a Closet with Vanna White

Doctor, every night I have the strangest dreams Doctor, listen to me, tell me what this means First I’m goin’ shoppin’ in my underwear Then all of sudden I’m floating in mid air My lips fall off and everybody starts to stare Donuts and hot dogs are flying everywhere Now Doctor, wait a minute, you […]

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