Coming this Christmas to a theater near you The most horrifying film to hit the screen There’s a homicidal maniac who finds a Cub Scout troop And he hacks up two or three in every scene Please don’t reveal the secret ending to your friends Don’t spoil the big surprise You won’t believe your eyes […]
Fat and weak, what a disgrace Guess the champ got too lazy Ain’t gonna fly now, he’s just takin’ up space Sold his gloves, threw his eggs down the drain But he’s no bum, he works down the street He bought the neighborhood deli Back on his feet, now he’s choppin’ up meat Come inside, […]
We all used to call him Jimmy the Geek He was a dumb lookin’ scrawny little four-eyed freak He never used to hang around with the guys He’d just sit in the corner attractin’ the flies He wasn’t much to look at He never was very bright But at least there was one thing that […]
There’s a sale on our gabardine suits today They’re all thirty percent off from yesterday There’s Fortrel polyester, leather, wool, and tweed Just a Visa or MasterCard is all you need We’ve got every color, we’ve got every shade We’re located next door to Willy’s Fun Arcade We got every fabric that was ever made […]
NOTE: Lyrics in ITALICS were sung by female “operators”. NOTE: Lyrics in BOLD were sung by the “operators” & Al together. I need a Vegematic I need a Pocket Fisherman I need a handy appliance That’ll scramble an egg while it’s still inside its shell Operators are standing by How does that make you feel Help me Mr. Popeil […]
They tell us that we lost our tails Evolving up from little snails I say it’s all just wind and sails Are we not men, we are Devo Are we not men, D E V O Smoke on the water And fire in the sky Smoke on the water (I’m A Man) I’m a boy […]
Gonna buy me a condo Gonna buy me a Cuisinart Get a wall-to-wall carpeting Get a wallet full ‘o credit cards I gonna buy me a condo, never have to mow de lawn I gonna get me da T-shirt wit’ de alligator on Wo, used to live in Jamaica But I don’t live dere no […]
You can watch Mr. Rogers You can watch Three’s Company And you can turn on Fame or The Newlywed Game Or The Addams Family I say, you can watch Barney Miller And you can watch your MTV And you can watch ’till your eyes fall out of your head That’ll be OK with me And […]
I was waiting in the express lane with my twelve items or less At the checkout counter at the local grocery store I was only passin’ by But a paper caught my eye And I learned a few things I never knew before It said your pet may be an extra terrestrial It said the […]
