Posts in category: Off the Deep End
When I Was Your Age

Let me tell you sonny… let me set you straight You kids today ain’t never had it rough Always had everything handed to you on a silver plate You lazy brats think nothing’s good enough Well, nobody ever drove me to school when it was ninety degrees below We had to walk butt-naked through forty […]

Trigger Happy

Got an AK-47, well you know it makes me feel alright. Got an Uzi by my pillow, helps me sleep a little better at night. There’s no feeling any greater Than to shoot first and ask questions later. Now I’m trigger happy, trigger happy every day. Well, you can’t take my guns away, I got […]

The Plumbing Song

Baby, I sure wish I could lend you a hand But plumbing’s one thing I don’t understand It’s true (haven’t got a clue) B-b-b-baby, I can tell you’ve got a big problem When I flush the john, then your shower goes on (Baby) Now whatcha gonna do? If Drano’s a joke and your plunger is […]

Airline Amy

Met this pretty young stewardess on a non-stop flight She showed me to my seat and it was love at first sight Now lately I’ve been flying to all kinds of places That I never really wanted to go ‘Cause I’ll do anything just to spend a little time With the cutest flight attendant I […]

Taco Grande

Taco… grande. Taco… grande Yo quiero chimichangas y chile colorado Yo tengo el dinero para un steak picado Las flautas y tamales, siempre muy bueno Y el chile relleno You see, I just gotta have a tostada, carne asada That’s right, I want the whole enchilada My only addiction has to do with a flour […]

I Was Only Kidding

When I said that I’d be faithful When I promised I’d be true When I swore that I could never Be with anyone but you When I told you that I loved you With those tender words I spoke I was only kidding Now, can’t you take a joke? When I said that I need […]

Polka Your Eyes Out

Rock the cradle of love. Rock the cradle of love Yes, the cradle of love Don’t rock easy, it’s true Rock the cradle of love I rocked the cradle of love Yes, the cradle of love Don’t rock easy, it’s true Doo doo doo doo doo doodoo doo doo doo doo doo doo doodoo doo […]

The White Stuff

The White Stuff. The white stuff. The first one was a sweet one. Second one was a blast. Soon I finished off the bag, ate ’em up real fast. You can see ’em in my teeth, Tell it when I talk, Had so many my pancreas just went into shock. I love the white stuff, […]

I Can’t Watch This

I can’t watch this. I can’t watch this I can’t watch this. I can’t watch this My my my my TV makes me so bored Makes me say, oh my lord What is this garbage here? Wanna cover my eyes and plug my ears It sucks, and that’s no lie It’s about as much fun […]

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